When it comes to living our lives, Christ doesn't make up the difference. He IS the difference.

Well, since it's almost midnight, I suppose that I can start writing. Who says I actually have to wait until tomorrow? Doesn't Dave have the most beautiful, catching smile? That's what charmed me from the very beginning. I can't believe that it has been six months since he passed away. It's amazing to think that we've all survived and we aren't that much worse for the wear. Naturally, we miss Dave and think about him often. ( I think about him every day, but I don't want to downplay every one elses feelings.) He was such a powerful man and such a strong influence for good. As I was doing this video, I downloaded twice as many photos as you see, but because I wanted them to fit within the length of the first song, I had to chop all but the most important ones: our family. Just about a year ago, as Dave sat pondering his lot in life and his contributions he questioned the Lord. "Is this it? Is this all I get to do? What have I accomplished?" An...

When we were able to speak with Elder Holland over the phone back in February, I was uncomfortable speaking to a general authority. I was afraid of stumbling over my words, sounding dumb, or saying something that I shouldn't. Dave, however, was completely at ease. He spoke to him as his friend and commented to me later that he would behave the same if the prophet or if Christ were in our home. "He is my friend. I know him and I love him." David did, and David does. Today I was able to drive with the kids down to St. George and meet with Elder and Sister Holland. It was an experience that I will always prize. But what amazes me the most is that I don't feel any different. I don't know what I was expecting to feel, but I just feel like me. He didn't tell me I wasn't doing things right, he didn't counsel me, he just listened, and provided hope. And Sister Holland? Hurrah for the sister's of this church. The backbone of the men, and the sup...

I can't believe that my oldest is already 10 years old. Thanks to Dave's preparation, Caden was able to open a birthday card from him today. It encouraged him to start to prepare for the priesthood that he will receive in two years. I can't believe he's only two years away from being a deacon! Caden had a great birthday. He got to celebrate at school, at the soccer game (where he scored 2 of the 3 goals), and at Applebee's after. Thanks for all of the phonecalls. I think that he really enjoyed his day. Caden is such a hard worker. He strives for 100% when it comes to school. He won't take anything less, but he loves to get extra credit! Last year his overall score was 432/435 total points or something like that. Dave and I sarcastically expressed our disappointment. Caden took the 4-wheeler certification course just 3 weeks ago. He told me that the test would be a piece of cake and so he didn't study. (I was hoping that he would fail and learn th...

Five months and we're still holding onto you, Daddy. We love you and we miss you so much. We're trying to be good so that we can be with you again. Sometimes we feel you nearby. At first, I thought that I was hurting so deeply, that it couldn't possibly get worse, and with every passing day and month, it gets worse. You hurt deeper and love greater. It's like a wound that is deep, and as you clean a little of the dirt and grime away it feels a little better, but you can never fully recover until you get down deep and clean all of the "gunk" out. "I hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most; 'Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all." -Tennyson

We love going back to school! It was so peaceful around the house the day the kids started back to school. I decluttered, canned chicken, froze hamburger and ran errands! Yeah! I have my life back!

Brother and Sister Hunt took us up to their property on Cedar Mountain, near Kolob reservoir. It was beautiful. It turns out Jacob is not allergic to horses, just hay. These ones that feed from the mountain meadows don't give him any problems. Alli enjoyed riding the horses, and named the colt "Chewey" because he was chewing on anything and everything. I got to lead Jacob and Allison around on the horse. Caden didn't really like the colt chewing on his foot. What he really enjoys is 4-wheeling!

Owing to Dave's illness, we were put in contact with Elder Holland. He has been a blessing and a balm to us in our times of trial. I contact him once a month, as he requested, to update him on how our family is doing. This month, I contacted him early, requesting that he make a phonecall to the McDonald(18)boy (mentioned in my previous entry) while he recoveres in the hospital. The response from this wonderful man was, "Will do." Thanks to his wonderful example of discipleship, I now know how the Savior loves each one of us. He is never to busy or over-burdened to find time for those who stray, or just find the pathway too difficult to walk alone. He loves us!