When it comes to living our lives, Christ doesn't make up the difference. He IS the difference.

From left to right: Jacci, mother of one ✷ Georgia, mother of three  ✷ Molly, mother of one with #2 on the way  ✷ Lisel, mother of 4  ✷ Karen (Mom), mother of 6. Our greatest ambitions were to become wives and mothers, and we did it! My mother was a teenager during the women's rights movements of the 60's.   She remembers hearing their rallying cries for freedom from the oppression of motherhood.  She heard slogans such as "Renounce your martyrdom.  Become a liberated mother-a woman, not a mom." I'll be forever grateful that she didn't listen. My mother was raised by a stay-at-home mom, and so was I.  I couldn't be more proud.  Now that I live in that realm, I have a real understanding and a genuine appreciation for all that it entails.  I think Elder Jeffry R. Holland said it best as he quoted a young mother.  "How is it that a human being can love a child so deeply that you willingly give a major portion of your freedom...

Divorce What it is. It is a big, ugly word that most people don't want to associate themselves with.  I daresay that, in recent years, it has brought more tragedy, more heartache, heartbreak and loss to the citizens of the United States than any of our other "tragic" or "catastrophic" events combined.  It's sad that we take the lead for divorce throughout the world.  I wish "divorced" wasn't one of the titles that I carried. This is a touchy subject.  There are always two sides and often more.  Divorce is like throwing a pebble into a smooth pond, the ripples extend all of the way to the shore, affecting all that it touches.  When I began to consider divorce, I knew this was true, so I did everything I could to ensure that I was making the correct choice.  Most especially, I wanted to ensure the best outcome for my 3 children that were involved. It is estimated that 40-50% of first marriages end in divorce and 60% of second marriages.  ...

Feeling a little chilly? We joke about it, but it is often true.  When we begin marriage, our passion and dedication ignite a fire between us, but that fire fades, and if we're not careful, we can let things cool to the point where they're almost unbearable.   How do I avoid getting sick and tired? All it takes is a little research into marriage studies to find out the cold hard facts:  people are generally healthier if they're married, even if their marriage is less than ideal.  "A stable marriage correspond[s] with happiness, health, prosperity, and the well-being of offspring and communities." (Successful Marriages and Families p. 71). With the advent of increasing numbers of social media posts, blogs and feeds, we have no shortage of comments on the subject of marriage.  The problem is that most of it is just opinion, but as the saying goes, the squeaky wheel gets the grease.  It's the outspoken, outlandish, unfounded outbursts of th...

Elder Bruce C. Hafen tells the following story: "[A] bride sighed blissfully on her wedding day, 'Mom, I'm at the end of all my troubles!' 'Yes,' replied her mother, 'but at which end?'" This story always makes me laugh because it demonstrates the ignorance that often accompanies courtship.  There is a lot to be said for the mother's reply.  Truly, all troubles do not end with "I do."  Life is difficult.  It was actually designed to be so, and a critical component to a happy and fulfilling marriage is learning to respectfully handle differences because the truth is . . . you're going to have them.  Here are some tips from "Successful Marriages and Families." Prevention.   Sometimes you don't need to bring it up.  Be charitable in your thoughts and your actions.  Visit regularly with your spouse each day.   This prevents a breakdown in communication that is all-too-common in marriages today. Continue your c...

av·er·age ˈav(ə)rij/ noun 1 . a number expressing the central or typical value in a set of data, in particular the mode, median, or (most commonly) the mean, which is calculated by dividing the sum of the values in the set by their number. "the housing prices there are twice the national average" I truly believe that once we marry, we become the average of ourselves and the person we marry.  In other words, if you marry someone who's better than you . . . congratulations, you're going to become better.  However, if you do the opposite, my condolences on your loss. That statement is humorous, but not completely true because we all have strengths and weaknesses, so, while I believe that you and your spouse average each other out, it is in any number of categories: spirituality, physical strength, patience, intuition, beauty, etc.  Perhaps a more appropriate term is balance. That being said, we must give and accept influence in our m...

"Positive emotions toward one's spouse are vital to a healthy marriage.  Negative emotions, if they occur frequently and are allowed to deepen, can threaten a marriage." Two years after I lost my first husband to cancer, I remarried. Life was wonderful, but less than a year after we'd married, he began to tell me that we should get divorced. It was infrequent, so I ignored it. I should not have. It did nothing to help our marriage, and every time the words were said, they hurt. As the years went by, and life's stru ggles began to mount and increase, he began to suggest divorce on a regular basis. 5 years went by, and one day when he said those words, "We should just get divorced," I replied, "I think you're right." (Now, there is much more to our story. This is the smallest portion of it, but it will serve the purpose of explaining my point.) WORDS ARE POWERFUL! Do not ever say anything that you do not mean, or that you do not want...

"Love as distinct from 'being in love' is not merely a feeling.  It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit . . . They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other . . ." -C. S. Lewis Could we really consider spending the rest of our lives-the rest of eternity-with someone we didn't consider a friend?  It sounds like a crazy, unrewarding prospect.  Friendship is crucial, but it requires constant, intentional work.  Elder Lynn G. Robbins reminds us that "we must make the conscious decision that we will love our spouse and family with all our heart, soul, and mind; that we will build, not 'fall into,' strong, loving marriages and families." Christlike love is what leads the way in marriage.  A sacrifice of one's one interests for the good of the whole. For those who know of my circumstance, this begs the question, "Then what happened?" After my ...

This is the engagement photo for Dave and I.  Can you believe how young we were?  1997.  Where does the time go? Dave and I were married in March of 1998.  We were both young and the sun shone brightly above the horizon of our lives.  There were no clouds in the sky, no shadows eclipsing our path, just our own faith illuminating our way.  We could never have guessed the intensity of the storms that would try us and prove the strength of our marriage. It turns out that our marriage had it's share of fowl weather, but we'd managed to make the most of the sunshine, and we took advantage of the opportunity to dance in the rain.  The storms came and went, as storms often do, but on March 21, 2009, as we celebrated our 11th anniversary, a tempest began to rage with more intensity than we had ever seen before. 3 days later, Dave was taken to the other side of the veil.  He reminded me before he left that we can continue to grow together, but...

I have attempted to establish a new blog numerous times throughout the years, but with no success. It intimidates me, quite frankly. I have some great content to post. I've certainly learned a few lessons throughout the years that others might benefit from, but there's so much pressure and . . . COMPARISON! Comparison truly is the thief of joy. If we lived and measured our own success against ourselves, I think we would find ourselves receiving a great deal more credit than we actually do. For the time being, I've give up the chase for a newer, more clean-looking blog, and I'll continue to post here. Aside from being out-of-date, a post is long overdue. So, as Maria from the Sound of Music would say, "Let's start at the very beginning." My last post was over 7 years ago. Much has happened over the course of those years, as you will soon discover. I did indeed marry Kevin Mudrow on January 7, 2011. My three children and I moved out to Grants P...