On being single . . .

It's frustrating to be back in the dating world again with all of its games and broken hearts.

Just a couple of months before Dave found out about the cancer, I remember watching a single, divorced young woman in our ward flirt with her "boyfriend." I remember rolling my eyes and thinking how grateful I was that I would never have to go through that again.

And, just as the Lord always seems to do, He stepped in and helped me to realize that I should never say NEVER.
I always said I would never move to Arizona. I did.
I said I'd go anywhere but Tucson. We went to Tucson.
I said I wouldn't move closer to the Mexican border. We moved to Sahuarita-20 minutes closer to the border.
I vowed I would never move back to Cedar City because all of the people here are the same people that I went to college with! Then we moved back and joined them!
After Dave passed away, I decided that I wouldn't date for the first year. I met someone 7 months later.

Maybe I should start saying that I'll never get remarried! (Wink.)

I met Ryan Harmer in Jerusalem last December. I knew it was right. He didn't, and he used his agency to date someone else (while I thought we were still dating.) Then when I called to check up on him, he informed me that he'd "found someone else". Nice way to find out, eh? One day he tells me he wants to keep calling and dating and three weeks later he's talking about getting engaged to someone that's definitely not me . . .

Anyway, as my home teacher would say,"That's neither here nor there." The point is that we all have agency and we all have the right to use it. And, sometimes we find it unfortunate that we would be acting in opposition to the Lords plan if we tried to take it away from anyone. As God can force no man to heaven, no woman can force a man to marry her, or vice versa.

We have the privilege and opportunity of learning and deciding for ourselves.

Do I want the tall one? The good looking one? The hard worker? The money maker? The spiritual giant? The one who always puts the Lord first? The divorced one? The widowed one? The one with three kids? The one with no kids? The one who's never been married? The skinny one? The athletic one? The overweight one? The one who lives away from my family? The one who lives by my family? The one who dances? The one who sings? The one who makes me laugh? The one I enjoy talking to?

We also have the opportunity to make the most of what we've been given. Who will help us to do that? Who will help us to become all that we can be? Who will help us attain the Celestial Kingdom?

That's what matters the most. Ultimately it's not who we are. Ultimately it's not who they are. But the potential of what we can ultimately become- together.

Comments

Jodi & Dan said…
Oh Georgia, you put it into words so perfectly!! I remember my frustrating dating days all too well--they weren't that long ago. But I think you have a much better perspective and attitude than I ever did. :)
June 8, 2010 at 7:35 PM
Abbey said…
Hi Georgia--
I haven't posted on here before. Perhaps you don't even know me--I'm Lisa Allen--Michael's wife. Your mom mentioned I may want to read your blog sometime.
It's great.
Your words ring true and I hope to be able to read them more often.
Keep on keepin' on, right?
Thanks for sharing~
Lisa Allen
September 13, 2010 at 9:10 PM
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