Dave's Funeral Talk
Because the people Dave had wanted to speak at his funeral were unable to come, Dave ended up being the concluding speaker at his own funeral. Several people have asked me for a copy of his talk, so here it is.
Thanks to all of the angels who have been sent in the form of service, visits, phone calls, e-mails & letters. You have helped me in so many ways.
During the first week of December, a group of guys from Tucson came up to visit. They’re kind of a rough group; strike first, strike hard. You know the type.
Through the years I’ve grown to love them like brothers. They would do anything to help me and I them. Any one of them would trade places with me if they could, but at the risk of diminishing their reputation, they were a “tough” group of guys. They visited for a day and went home. I was much lifted by their visit. We had such a good time riding the quads and staying up reminiscing.
After they left I started to feel worse. I ended up on a fluid diet for many days and by Sunday night I was just plain miserable. I was pleading with the Lord to let me go, and if not, to show me His plan so that I could at least know why I was still here. In short, I felt miserable and also felt like I had fulfilled my purpose on earth and had, at this point, been reduced to a full-time couch potato.
Georgia called Brother Adams to give me a blessing. My thought was, “Call someone else! I already know what he’s going to say, and it isn’t what I want. There is no way he is going to let me out of this! Then, the first thing he said as he gave me my blessing was that “God [would] show his plan to [me].”
The very next day, Randy called and said that on the way home, the other guys were amazed by how we were handling the situation and wondered how we could handle it. Was our reaction real? Or were we just putting on a front for them? In short, Randy said they had a great conversation on the way home and that they were uplifted by their visit to uplift me.
I realized then that God still had a plan for me and my want-to-go-home-attitude changed dramatically. I felt that as long as the Lord could use me to help others then I was willing to stay here and do that, even if it meant being in pain and misery to do it. The Lord showed me a part of His plan through these five good friends and it was an incredible change to my attitude; for which I will ever be grateful.
I want to answer their questions myself. Yes the happiness is real, and this is why . . .
I know that there is a God in Heaven. I call Him Heavenly Father. I know He loves me and watches over my family. He is all-knowing and all-powerful and thereby watches over, loves, and cares for each one of you and your families. We lived with Him before we came to the earth. He loves us so much that He wants us to become like Him and share in His happiness. To do this He created a plan which I like to call the Plan of Happiness or Plan of Salvation.
As a part of this plan, we would have to leave His presence and come to the earth. There were two reasons for this: to receive a body, and to be tested. One reason that I am assured our Father in Heaven loves us is that He sent His only begotten son, Jesus Christ to this earth and as a part of this plan, let Him die for us. This death was to help us overcome the two problems we now faced because of the two purposes for which we came here. By receiving a body, we also have to receive death, and through being tested, each of us sin and fall short of the perfection necessary to return to the presence of God. Jesus made it possible for us to repent and be made clean as well as to resurrect and have a perfect, immortal body.
This plan is for everyone. We all have different ways of getting through this plan. For my family, our way for the last few years has been through dealing with cancer.
I want everyone to know that from the very beginning of the trial, we knew that it was part of Heavenly Father’s plan. It was the plan for us. This was shown to me in a prayer in which the Spirit, or Holy Ghost, told me very clearly these comforting yet sobering words, ‘That which doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger.” Now that obviously only held true for me until recently, but that promise continues on for my family.
We have always looked at this as a blessing and although we have had some pretty rough days, we have never had the desire to “curse God and die” or to be angry about this lot in life. Scared? Yes. Upset? Yes, but angry? No.
Knowing that the Lord is all-powerful, all-knowing, and very loving helps us to just go along with the plan. He is smarter than I will ever be and I guess I figure that I probably shouldn’t try and mess with that.
Of course to all of this is the eternal perspective which is really where our happiness in this trial comes from. As part of God’s plan, He made it possible for husbands and wives and children to carry their greatest joys on past his life and into the next. This does not mean that my 800CC Can Am Outlander Max (complete with windshield, snowplow and winch) can come with me. What is does mean, though, is that there is more than marriage that is only “until death do you part.”
To Peter was given the power to seal on earth and in Heaven and to loose on earth and in the Heavens. With this same Priesthood power that was held by Peter, and ultimately the Savior, Georgia and I were sealed for “time and all eternity.” This is what makes us able to go through this life and its trials, knowing that if we endure well, we will be able to be together throughout the eternities with our children and our posterity. This is why I refer to Gods plan as a plan of Happiness.
Not knowing this would lend to many questions when faced with a trial like this such as: why me? What happens after this? What about my family? For me, I find it difficult to imagine- to have to mourn a loss without having the answers to those questions.
So, I’ve gone on long enough. I hope that this brings peace and comfort to all of you.
I do want to end with one thing. In all of this, we have had many people pray and even fast for us (and for me specifically) that a miracle would occur and I would be healed. Obviously, after monitoring the current situation, I think it is fair to say that did not happen. What has happened over the last few years has been a compilation of many, many miracles ranging from big to small; miracles that many might wipe off as coincidence or happenstance. Should we do that, we miss the miracle altogether.
My sweet wife will be the first to tell you that we have been greatly blessed. The Lord has provided for us and we have felt His guiding love and influence in our lives more now than at any other time. My greatest fear in all of this is that someone loses their faith in our Father in Heaven because I was not healed and a miracle not completed in the manner that we would have liked it to have happened.
I go back to two things: first, God is smarter than we are; second, I believe that the miracle is being able to see the miracles that happen every day in our lives.
I want to spend what little time I have left (no pun intended) telling my sweet family how much I love them. We have had a difficult time having to grow though this, but we have had a wonderful and blessed time doing it as well. There are not too many 30 year olds who get to basically retire for three years and spend that time making memories that will last a lifetime.
Poor Allison will have to be reprogrammed someday to understand why other daddy’s go to work and have a job. Currently, she believes that we go to the grocery store to get money. (Debit is a wonderful thing, you know!) I count it a great blessing to have amassed trips with Georgia and the kids to Alaska, Hawaii, Washington D.C., Oregon, and California several times, the sand dunes, and other places to camp and spent time together.
What I have realized, though, is that it doesn’t have to be a long trip to build a family. It does take determination and a little hard work. To this end I leave my little bit of advice to Georgia and the kids.
First, to Georgia. Don’t worry, be happy. Do I need to sing it? Live life and love it. Have a smile on your face enough everyday to make up for the one that will be missing. Don’t forget that the only thing separating us is the veil. Let’s continue to grow together!!
Caden, be a kid, not a dad. You will be much happier, and have a lot less worries. Lead by love and kindness and your brother and sister will return it, and always remember that you don’t score from half court!
Jacob, give your mom a hug every day. She will need it. I don’t need to sing the don’t worry be happy song to you because I think that you may have been Bobby McFarrin in a previous life. Keep your happy go-lucky attitude. Remember: fast, fun, friendly!
Allison, always remember the great secret to life, for it will bring you much happiness and lead to less misery and timeout. It is also the easy way. Do what your mom and dad ask you to do the first time. I love you sweety. You know how to lighten my day and I hope you use that to help mom as well.
For everyone else, follow the counsel I gave to Alli. Do what your Father in Heaven asks you to do the first time and use that light to brighten other peoples days.
I know that I have already gone on too long, but I figure, what’s the worst that could happen at this point? So I want to leave you with the things that I know to be true. I know that our Heavenly Father loves us. I know that He set up a plan and that we were all a part of that plan. I know that He sent His son to make that ultimate sacrifice for each one of us if we would repent. I know that he has arranged for us to have eternal marriages in temples and that through the restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ by Joseph Smith the prophet, the Book of Mormon was brought forth. I know that the priesthood power was restored and remains on the earth today to ensure that the plan of happiness can be carried out. This is my happiness, until we meet again. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
Thanks to all of the angels who have been sent in the form of service, visits, phone calls, e-mails & letters. You have helped me in so many ways.
During the first week of December, a group of guys from Tucson came up to visit. They’re kind of a rough group; strike first, strike hard. You know the type.
Through the years I’ve grown to love them like brothers. They would do anything to help me and I them. Any one of them would trade places with me if they could, but at the risk of diminishing their reputation, they were a “tough” group of guys. They visited for a day and went home. I was much lifted by their visit. We had such a good time riding the quads and staying up reminiscing.
After they left I started to feel worse. I ended up on a fluid diet for many days and by Sunday night I was just plain miserable. I was pleading with the Lord to let me go, and if not, to show me His plan so that I could at least know why I was still here. In short, I felt miserable and also felt like I had fulfilled my purpose on earth and had, at this point, been reduced to a full-time couch potato.
Georgia called Brother Adams to give me a blessing. My thought was, “Call someone else! I already know what he’s going to say, and it isn’t what I want. There is no way he is going to let me out of this! Then, the first thing he said as he gave me my blessing was that “God [would] show his plan to [me].”
The very next day, Randy called and said that on the way home, the other guys were amazed by how we were handling the situation and wondered how we could handle it. Was our reaction real? Or were we just putting on a front for them? In short, Randy said they had a great conversation on the way home and that they were uplifted by their visit to uplift me.
I realized then that God still had a plan for me and my want-to-go-home-attitude changed dramatically. I felt that as long as the Lord could use me to help others then I was willing to stay here and do that, even if it meant being in pain and misery to do it. The Lord showed me a part of His plan through these five good friends and it was an incredible change to my attitude; for which I will ever be grateful.
I want to answer their questions myself. Yes the happiness is real, and this is why . . .
I know that there is a God in Heaven. I call Him Heavenly Father. I know He loves me and watches over my family. He is all-knowing and all-powerful and thereby watches over, loves, and cares for each one of you and your families. We lived with Him before we came to the earth. He loves us so much that He wants us to become like Him and share in His happiness. To do this He created a plan which I like to call the Plan of Happiness or Plan of Salvation.
As a part of this plan, we would have to leave His presence and come to the earth. There were two reasons for this: to receive a body, and to be tested. One reason that I am assured our Father in Heaven loves us is that He sent His only begotten son, Jesus Christ to this earth and as a part of this plan, let Him die for us. This death was to help us overcome the two problems we now faced because of the two purposes for which we came here. By receiving a body, we also have to receive death, and through being tested, each of us sin and fall short of the perfection necessary to return to the presence of God. Jesus made it possible for us to repent and be made clean as well as to resurrect and have a perfect, immortal body.
This plan is for everyone. We all have different ways of getting through this plan. For my family, our way for the last few years has been through dealing with cancer.
I want everyone to know that from the very beginning of the trial, we knew that it was part of Heavenly Father’s plan. It was the plan for us. This was shown to me in a prayer in which the Spirit, or Holy Ghost, told me very clearly these comforting yet sobering words, ‘That which doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger.” Now that obviously only held true for me until recently, but that promise continues on for my family.
We have always looked at this as a blessing and although we have had some pretty rough days, we have never had the desire to “curse God and die” or to be angry about this lot in life. Scared? Yes. Upset? Yes, but angry? No.
Knowing that the Lord is all-powerful, all-knowing, and very loving helps us to just go along with the plan. He is smarter than I will ever be and I guess I figure that I probably shouldn’t try and mess with that.
Of course to all of this is the eternal perspective which is really where our happiness in this trial comes from. As part of God’s plan, He made it possible for husbands and wives and children to carry their greatest joys on past his life and into the next. This does not mean that my 800CC Can Am Outlander Max (complete with windshield, snowplow and winch) can come with me. What is does mean, though, is that there is more than marriage that is only “until death do you part.”
To Peter was given the power to seal on earth and in Heaven and to loose on earth and in the Heavens. With this same Priesthood power that was held by Peter, and ultimately the Savior, Georgia and I were sealed for “time and all eternity.” This is what makes us able to go through this life and its trials, knowing that if we endure well, we will be able to be together throughout the eternities with our children and our posterity. This is why I refer to Gods plan as a plan of Happiness.
Not knowing this would lend to many questions when faced with a trial like this such as: why me? What happens after this? What about my family? For me, I find it difficult to imagine- to have to mourn a loss without having the answers to those questions.
So, I’ve gone on long enough. I hope that this brings peace and comfort to all of you.
I do want to end with one thing. In all of this, we have had many people pray and even fast for us (and for me specifically) that a miracle would occur and I would be healed. Obviously, after monitoring the current situation, I think it is fair to say that did not happen. What has happened over the last few years has been a compilation of many, many miracles ranging from big to small; miracles that many might wipe off as coincidence or happenstance. Should we do that, we miss the miracle altogether.
My sweet wife will be the first to tell you that we have been greatly blessed. The Lord has provided for us and we have felt His guiding love and influence in our lives more now than at any other time. My greatest fear in all of this is that someone loses their faith in our Father in Heaven because I was not healed and a miracle not completed in the manner that we would have liked it to have happened.
I go back to two things: first, God is smarter than we are; second, I believe that the miracle is being able to see the miracles that happen every day in our lives.
I want to spend what little time I have left (no pun intended) telling my sweet family how much I love them. We have had a difficult time having to grow though this, but we have had a wonderful and blessed time doing it as well. There are not too many 30 year olds who get to basically retire for three years and spend that time making memories that will last a lifetime.
Poor Allison will have to be reprogrammed someday to understand why other daddy’s go to work and have a job. Currently, she believes that we go to the grocery store to get money. (Debit is a wonderful thing, you know!) I count it a great blessing to have amassed trips with Georgia and the kids to Alaska, Hawaii, Washington D.C., Oregon, and California several times, the sand dunes, and other places to camp and spent time together.
What I have realized, though, is that it doesn’t have to be a long trip to build a family. It does take determination and a little hard work. To this end I leave my little bit of advice to Georgia and the kids.
First, to Georgia. Don’t worry, be happy. Do I need to sing it? Live life and love it. Have a smile on your face enough everyday to make up for the one that will be missing. Don’t forget that the only thing separating us is the veil. Let’s continue to grow together!!
Caden, be a kid, not a dad. You will be much happier, and have a lot less worries. Lead by love and kindness and your brother and sister will return it, and always remember that you don’t score from half court!
Jacob, give your mom a hug every day. She will need it. I don’t need to sing the don’t worry be happy song to you because I think that you may have been Bobby McFarrin in a previous life. Keep your happy go-lucky attitude. Remember: fast, fun, friendly!
Allison, always remember the great secret to life, for it will bring you much happiness and lead to less misery and timeout. It is also the easy way. Do what your mom and dad ask you to do the first time. I love you sweety. You know how to lighten my day and I hope you use that to help mom as well.
For everyone else, follow the counsel I gave to Alli. Do what your Father in Heaven asks you to do the first time and use that light to brighten other peoples days.
I know that I have already gone on too long, but I figure, what’s the worst that could happen at this point? So I want to leave you with the things that I know to be true. I know that our Heavenly Father loves us. I know that He set up a plan and that we were all a part of that plan. I know that He sent His son to make that ultimate sacrifice for each one of us if we would repent. I know that he has arranged for us to have eternal marriages in temples and that through the restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ by Joseph Smith the prophet, the Book of Mormon was brought forth. I know that the priesthood power was restored and remains on the earth today to ensure that the plan of happiness can be carried out. This is my happiness, until we meet again. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
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